It was orange, goofy and uncomfortable. There was no way I was wearing it. As I stood staring at the ocean in front of me, a kayak at my feet and a paddle in my hand, the thought of wearing this ridiculous life-vest seemed unimaginable. I boldly tossed it to the shore, confident in my ability as a swimmer.
Three separate times I was tossed from the kayak. I remained in the deep water, paddle in hand, as I watched the boat rode the wave back to shore. Three times I made the swim back to the beach.
An hour before I was determined not to use the lifejacket. It was ugly, uncomfortable and in my mind, unnecessary. I could handle this. Fast forward a few minutes and pride and arrogance gave way to desperate dependance.
Here’s my paraphrase. Happy are the desperate and dependent.
If I’m not careful, sometimes the same ridiculous thoughts I had standing by the ocean can seep into my heart and mind. While I’d never be so bold as to toss my faith to the side, there are times when it does feel unnecessary. Aren’t there certain things I can handle on my own?
Sometimes walking with Jesus becomes uncomfortable, He may call me out on a sin or call me to step up as a husband and father. Sometimes a walk with Christ causes me to stand out and look a little stranger than I already do.
But, like fighting a current, and swimming with your hands full, a life lived in our own power is utterly exhausting. If we want to experience the kingdom of God, we must live a life of desperate dependance.
What are you desperate to see happen in your life?
What would it look like to live dependent on Jesus?